I’d gone hunting once or twice in the first go around but was going to make a more concerted effort to do it as much as possible. It would start with this Christmas gift.The next day on my way to kickboxing, I stopped at a supermarket and picked up a couple magazines to do some research for my Christmas list. I had also looked in phone book in the school library during lunch.In-between technique, practice and time with Mr. Singh, I spent about 15 minutes perusing the magazines to find what looked to be what I was wanting.Mom was at the kitchen table when I came in.“So, I didn’t see your Christmas list when I came home.”Going over to the counter, I grabbed a pencil and paper. I put the information down that I’d gathered and gave it to her.“Here you go.” I hadn’t even finished getting a plate of food when I heard her chime out.“You have got to be kidding me?”“Nope, that’s what I want.”“You expect me to buy you a bow and arrow?”“Actually, a gift certificate to a specific store would. With the coming of spring and the new lambs, my strength began to return. I felt more like a woman again and not a cold grey lump of clay. I could smell the young grass. One day I got up and staggered weakly down the hill. I had a question for the wise-woman, a question that had haunted my days and been woven into my very dreams. The villagers stared at me as I went by, but I ignored them. “Ha-ho,” I said outside the new hut in a voice that was rusty from never speaking. “I am… I was your apprentice.”“Come in,” said the same musical voice I remembered. I went in, but I made no sign this time. She was there just as always, cross-legged, grinding something in a mortar. I could not tell if the look on her face was sorrow or fear. “I am not your apprentice any more,” I said. “But I have a question. You owe me that.”“Yes?”“When the Mongol ****d me, my pussy got wet. Why did that happen? I had no desire for him. Am I at fault? Did I, in some way, wish for it? I am ashamed and confused.”She.
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