And I had a cupboard full of preserved meats and vegetables, cabinet full of booze, mason jars full of herb, a few other odds and ends, and a handful of half-full Canadian whiskey in my hand. The metal awning I had installed over the porch this summer was serving well, and I was quite comfortable, stoned, buzzed, and listening to Dylan play through the screen door.I was more than a little surprised to see a set of headlights cutting through the snow from the foot of my long driveway. Through a couple hundred yards of snow and pine trees, I recognized a white 4x4 suv coming up. Nobody I knew off the top of my head so, just to be safe, I squirted into the cabin and threw on a pair of silk pajama pants on my way to grabbing the little .32 out of my bookshelf. I put it in my front pocket and resumed my spot on the rocker before my guests were halfway down my muddy, rutted, stump-lined and snow hidden driveway.Pretty quick I realized that it was my former sister-in-law at the helm of the. Tell me what it’s like Mom, please?’ I wondered what happened to horses and basketball for my 18-year-old teenage daughter as I snapped at Nancy Ann, ‘Enough of this—get ready for your sister’s graduation rehearsal NOW!’ Nancy sighed, ‘OK, but if you won’t tell me how to fuck a guy and stuff, Aunt Sally will. She told me just to come out to Colorado Springs this summer to visit her and Uncle John and we’d have our ‘talk.’ Aunt Sally told me, ‘I was the daughter she never had, and she’d teach me everything just like she did you and Aunt Debbie!’ I’ll bet Aunt Debbie would too if you and Daddy would let me go to Florida to visit her and Uncle Larry. Aunt Debbie invites me to come and spend a couple weeks with them every summer. Mom, it’s been two years since we’ve seen Aunt Debbie, Uncle Larry, Michelle, and Bobby. Please can I go? Pretty please? Michelle told me, ‘We’d go to the beach every day!” I replied, ‘Nancy Ann, we’ll have to talk about all this later—now get ready!’ Nancy.
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