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After half an hour he returns and they ask him, "How did you make out?" First Place!" answers Superman. "Did you ever doubt?"They continue walking when they see a sign:"Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?"Pinocchio says "this is mine."Half an hour later, he returns with tears in his eyes. "What happened?" they asked."Who the hell is Obama?" asked Pinocchio.A solution to the ISIS problemThe US Army announced today the formation of a new 900-man elite fighting unit, called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF).These Mountain boys will be dropped off in Iraq, with plenty of cold beer, ammo, and gunships and have been given only the following facts about ISIS:1. The season opened today.2. There is no limit.3. They taste just like chicken.4. They hate beer, bacon, BBQ, pickups, nude women, rednecks, country music and Jesus.AND5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.The Pentagon expects the ISIS problem in IRAQ to be over by next. " "Yes Mistress." He whispered. "Good, now I'm going to get dressed, while you're waiting for the guests to arrive, you can set the table for seven people. If I'm not ready when they arrive, show them into the lounge room and give them drinks. Have you got that?" "Yes ... Mistress." He added. Tricia frowned slightly, then walked out of the room. That night was one of the worst Maria had ever experienced in his short life. As ordered, he admitted the guests and gave them drinks. Then when they were all seated at the dinner table he served them their food. As the night wore on and the wine began to take its toll, the guests became more adventurous. Maria's first 'surprise' came from a man in his mid to late fifties. As Maria reached over to top up his glass, he reached under his skirt and slid his hand up Maria's leg cupping his arse cheek in his hand. Maria was about to turn on him when he saw Tricia glaring at him from across the table, and he froze on the spot, fighting to hide his.
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