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You gotta understand, to women, nice guys are like furniture: they rarely ever notice em. They just expect em to be there and then don’t give em a second thought.’ ‘Not furniture,’ Brandon chortled, ‘they notice furniture. Something even less. Grass maybe. ‘So you’re saying I’m boring,’ Jake said. ‘No,’ Zach said, ‘absolutely not. Jake, you know you’re not boring. I know it, and Meredith knows it, and Christa and Brandon and probably even little Laurelyn here. But Amy doesn’t. To her, you look boring. And until you figure out how to <,I>,not<,/I>, look boring to her, it’s going to continue this way.’ ‘So, basically, to attract attention, I’ve gotta be an asshole,’ Jake said. ‘No,’ Christa said, ‘absolutely not. But you gotta be not-safe. You gotta be interesting. You can’t be ho-hum-same-old Jacob. You need to be volatile.’ ‘God, this makes us sound insane,’ Meredith said. ‘You aren’t?’ Brandon asked. Meredith gave him a look. ‘I know someone who’s gonna be sleeping on the. Standing right there in the airport I had to mentally fight a raging hard on. She was 5'2'', maybe 105 lbs, perfect figure. Her skin was golden, and looked smooth, and delicious. She had light blonde hair, and an amazing rack. She was wearing a vee neck tee shirt under her half zipped hooded sweater, and I could just tell they were large for her relative size.. and amazing.Sophie and Julia chit chatted all the way home, and continued in the kitchen, as Julia made Sophie her favorite dish to welcome her home. I took this as an opportunity to relieve myself so I wouldn't be making a napkin tent under the table during dinner. I tried to distract myself from unclean thoughts of my girlfriend's daughter by watching a little internet porn, and it did help, for what it was worth.When they called me to dinner, I came downstairs, hopeful that my freshly relieved balls would make me more resistant to dirty thoughts about Sophie, but not so much. She had apparently changed into something more.
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