. as I said before, that's fine by me," he muttered as she looked at him uncomfortably for a moment – obviously waiting for him to say something. "I'll leave you to get on then ... I have a couple of calls to make..."He headed back into his office and for the first time this week, he closed the door on her.Iris folded her arms on her desk and put her head down on them with a little groan.Dear God, what had possessed her to go on like that?His closed door told her in no uncertain terms what he had thought of her chattering. He was probably regretting letting her have the afternoon off now – or even worse was reconsidering her employment with him!James had wanted to get behind her guard, had wanted to develop something a little friendlier – to get to know her a little better, but that one glimpse had him running scared.The woman was just too fascinating – too distracting for his peace of mind.He dropped down into his chair, and snatched up the telephone.It was only as he lifted his hand. Before the team left for Christmas break, I got the chance to meet most of them and a few of the auxiliary staff. I spent my first Christmas break without my mother with Mack and Ellie. They did their best, but we all knew it wasn't enough to keep me from depression.I literally felt lost. I was away from anyone I knew and anyone I cared about was either gone or miles away. I wondered openly if this was my penance for all the shitty things I'd done in my early teens."Son," Mack said. "I don't know what you did them years — and I don't need to know. Whatever it was, it wasn't enough to earn your last year. But you got to find something to focus on. As bad as your life is, always remember there are those worse off."I knew he was right, but I wanted to wallow in my self-pity for awhile.Ellie wasn't about to let that happen. The week before Christmas she cornered me at dinner."I want to show you some pictures," she said. "I know we hardly mention Beth — we're still pissed at her. But here.
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